Marriage Notes

Wedding in Hingham, Massachusetts

2010-10-03T13:43:01-04:00

I went to a beautiful wedding this weekend! The service was at historic Old Ship Church in downtown Hingham, Massachusetts and the reception just a few doors down at Old Derby Academy.

Yes, Hingham is proud of its age. It was founded in 1635 and the Old Ship Church not much later.

Thankfully, the weather was amazing. It rained non-stop on Friday with heavy humidity, then dried up and the sun came out for a cool, brisk autumn afternoon. Today its again very gloomy and raw. Lucky couple, huh?

The reception had two nice points worth mentioning:

Delicious food - and cupcakes!
Great decorations with spherical lanterns dotting the air above the tables

Wedding in Greenwich, Connecticut

2010-08-18T05:28:45-04:00

I went to a wedding in Greenwich, Connecticut last weekend. My oh my, what a beautiful town!

The wedding was at the bride’s father’s house, and I was really impressed with how classy and charming his property and house was.

Here’s a picture I took with my Droid X mobile phone camera:

Prenuptials - All About Money?

2009-07-21T12:43:09-04:00

When I got married, my wife and I didn’t have much money so I didn’t think it made sense to draft a prenuptial agreement. I had always perceived them to be all about money.

Last year my wife informed me she wanted a divorce, and unfortunately I found myself at a severe disadvantage. We had just moved to a new state in pursuit of her career, and I had slowed down my career goals so that I could provide primary care for our daughter.

I did a little reading today and learned that prenuptial agreements regarding child custody are not recognized or enforced so that evaluations can be made in the best interest of the children. That makes sense, however I do wish that we had a contract regarding the circumstances under which we would move to a new state.

I’m so glad I’m able to spend time with my daughter, but I’m restricted from being her primary caretaker. I thus have ramped up my work schedule but it is very difficult to be effective now that I live in another state because my office and my work is still in my home state.

It was my mistake to trust my soon to be ex-wife, and I just have to remember not to make that mistake again. Furthermore, I wonder what I could have done to prevent this from happening to me. Could a written agreement about our obligations to each other have protected me? I’m not so sure. The greatest danger I found myself in was at risk of losing my relationship with my infant daughter.

Onteora Mountain House

2009-06-16T23:17:17-04:00

I went to an incredible wedding this weekend in the Catskill Mountains in Upstate New York.

The people were the best but the location was incredible too. The ceremony took place at the Onteora Mountain House which is literally on a mountain.

It overlooks the mountain valley with an absolutely breathtaking view.

Great Gifts

2009-06-09T10:04:04-04:00

When friends and family are getting married I always want to give a memorable gift. One that represents how unique and special the couple is. One idea I had recently is a tea set, something the couple can share together which has a spritz of tradition in it. Yixing pottery is a personal favorite for such an occasion, as it will soak up the flavors of the teas that have steeped in it over time. Thus imbuing the teapot with the flavors of the couples life together. A beautiful sentiment, not recommended for coffee drinkers.

Bride Saves Family from Burning House

2009-06-02T10:42:15-04:00

This is a great story of community. A bride on her way home from her wedding, saw a neighbors house was on fire, and alerted them to the blaze. She jumped out of the car in her wedding dress to knock on the neighbors door.

They say she entered the home when the family went running back inside for their pets. Her dress was slightly scorched, and her shoes were ruined when she stepped into a mud puddle getting out of the car.

She’s lucky she didn’t get burned in her dress - all that tooling strikes me as quite flammable.

To register or not to register….

2009-06-01T19:00:22-04:00

Well I almost never thought it would happen to me, but it did, I’m engaged. The whole wedding thing is kind of outside my realm of expertise. I was never the little girl planning my wedding for fun, so now that it’s upon me - I feel a bit lost. Recently at a family get together my aunt asked me if I was going to register.

I really hadn’t considered it. It feels weird to point out to people what we “want” for gifts. I guess the idea is to limit the amount of running around returning unwanted items, but I still feel uneasy over it. I just want people to come and celebrate with me and my fiance. But it became abundantly clear to me this past weekend that people want to give gifts, whether it’s out of kindness or a feeling of obligation I don’t know, but if you throw a party your guests are going to bring gifts.

So that leaves me in my current situation if we register won’t people feel obligated to give a gift, where as if we don’t the option seems a little more open ended.

To make things doubly complicated on myself if I were to register, I wouldn’t want to do it at your usual department store. If I’m going to get household items I want them to be the beautiful handmade art work on etsy, and etsy doesn’t have a bridal registry yet.

I have plenty of time, but I need to think of these things now before my inaction makes a decision for me.

Proposition 8

2008-11-07T20:54:40-05:00

Proposition 8 was on the California ballot as a constitutional amendment to outlaw gay marriage. I’m not sure where I stand on the issue, and it hardly matters because I don’t live in California and could not have voted on the issue.

Since I don’t know whether this is right or wrong, I also have to ask the question of whether “majority rule” is right or wrong. Just because more people support a ban on gay marriage, should it be illegal?

One example where government is not run by majority rule is the appointment of judges. Apparently this varies from state to state, but Federal Judges are appointed.

Some readers may wonder why this isn’t a clear issue for me. Its because marriage is one part of life where religion and the law intersect, and the lines are still very blurry. I don’t feel qualified with respect to either factor to have a strong opinion one way or the other.

Proposition 8 Information at Wikipedia